Dr Ly At ARVC- Overpriced!

Nope. Dr Ly didn't cure my dog's ears actually... the ears are STILL oozing puz. I just got to cope with it. My poor boy.

Dr Ly is too busy. He is always overseas when needed; I cannot trust that he will follow up if anything happens. I'm also getting pissed with his nurses. Bitches. And then i realised i've been so overcharged. Eg. a bottle of Azodyl costs $167 at ARVC, its $98 at mt pleasant. Blood test is $500, elsewhere is not more than $200. A 500ml NaCl is $28 at ARVC, elsewhere, $4.50! Ridiculous rip off!!!

Hates.

Not like a hungry ghost

This evening, there was a TV show regarding a bulimic girl.

There was this scene where the girl was shoving food into her mouth. On her right hand she had cakes and on her left she had pizza. Both hands were also busy grabbing other food like chips, chicken wings etc. She was eating fiercely like a ghost in the corner of her room, hiding. Her friends found her and started pulling her away but she was unable to stop eating. She was crying, and eating at the same time, saying that she was "unable to control herself".

Crap. I don't eat like that. I enjoy eating. Simple as that. I just want to eat and enjoy all the food that i like. And because i don't want to get fat with all those fattening food, i puke! I also don't HIDE! I enjoy eating out, eating while watching TV, eating "normally". Just what others are unaware is that i go to the bathroom to puke. I would eat all day at home, then go puke, and then shower. My family is so used to me "taking a long time (1 to 1.5 hrs) to shower". I only feel gulity when its with the food which my dad cooks!

Cannot stop peeing!

I read online that Lasix abuse helps lose weight. So i took 1, which was prescribed to my dog for his lungs, this morning. I now cannot stop peeing for 5 mins. While waiting for cabs earlier on, i had to rush to the nearest loo to pee, thrice. Ended up i was late for work. And during the 10 mins journey to reach the office, i almost cried in pain. I HAD to pee! And it coming now.... gotta go!

Once too big now too small.

I found a t-shirt which i had kept away cos it was too big sized. Tonight i put it on, its too small too tight. What have i become?!

Much too little

Only when u binge, then u've enough to puke. I thought i can start losing some weight by eating less. Backfired. Tonight these junks stay in cos i was unable to push them out. AND just when i finished Xenical last night. Tomorrow, a fatter me.
- 2 slices pandan cakes
- 2 plates nasi lemak (coconut rice, fried chicken wing, fried peanuts, onion egg, fry prawns)
- half pepper chicken.

"Oh, hey, you still look the same!"

My ex-manager came to the office on Wednesday. I waved to her when i saw her from a distance. She took a minute, then said, almost embarrassingly, "Oh, hey, you still look the same!". And i knew what she meant. I am double the size now from we last met 4 years ago. Her shocked & disgusted expression gave her away.

No life

I was planning to attend our company's chalet today. I fed my dog early at 5pm, then showered, styled my hair, & was getting dressed at 5.30pm. By 6pm, i decided not to go cos i don't look good in any clothes.

I told myself last night that i mustn't miss this again, & promised to go no matter what. I had even arranged to meet a colleague at 7.30pm, then go shop for party food. But i can't when i've no clothes to wear! It'd be a shame if i had to go wearing my old clothes, the usual ones which i wear to work everyday. I found pretty ones but i can't fit them anymore!

I hate it when i've to make really stupid excuses not to turn up tonight. I really wanted to go. I'm sure no one's going to invite me again cos for the past 4 years i always backed out last minute like today.

Now, 3 smses just came in, my fellow colleagues say they'd really like to see me there. Its Mothers' Day today & that is my excuse for tonight. Now, the irony is that i've also told my family i'm not going for dinner cos i've company's party.

Another sms from my cousins. Telling me they are missing me at grandma's. I'm just going to cry.